Facilitator: Bill Turpin
2009/1/29: 20:00~21:00
Key learning points
Feedback is given in view of the other person's (receiver's) goals and values. Opinion is given in view of the coach's (my) goals and values. When we give feedback, we need give it in view of the person's goals and values. To give feedback effectively, it requires that we must understand client's goals and values. How often do we make the mistakes assuming that we know the person's goals and values according to the past experience? Feedback is the statement of what is. It is not should do or ought to do. Feedback is neither positive nor negative, it is neutral. We want to help client become self-ware and subsequently self-decisive.
Coaches must be minded of our own opinions and judgments when we give feedback. We could ask clients a question: do you think that is what you really want to reflect for? Give the person and time for second thought. When giving feedback, we should be non-judgmental. Be aware of judgmental and we could "suspend judgment" for a moment and focus on client's goal and values (align with client's goals and values). Or it would be very easy for us to give feedback from our opinions, goals and values.
- Feedback attracts; opinion attacks.
- Real play (true story) is better than role play.
- Feedback is not about me (giver), is about the client (receiver).
- When you hear "what do you think?" They might need feedback but not opinions.
- Effective feedback: give feedback align with client's goals and values or help client become align with their goals and values.
Discussion
Q: How would you define feedback? What is feedback? What comes to your mind when you hear the word "feedback"?
- non-judgmental, reflect what's been said and done
- feedback gives us an opportunity to have a second thought and reflect to what happened
- perspective from the other person, which is different from my perspective
- positive feedback, objective feedback
Q: What would you say the difference of feedback vs. opinion?
Feedback: nonjudgmental, their own conclusion, objective, neutral, align with their journey, with permission, unbiased,
Opinion: judgmental, my ideas, subjective, personalized,
Q: How to know that we are giving feedback or opinions?
Opinions: from my (coach's) perspectives
Feedback: I don't have to agree with him, but I could appreciate his goals and values and his efforts - on target of his goal (client's perspective)
Q: To coach a client on leadership, with 360 feedback for the executive level. It's really difficult to get "feedback" but opinions. However, we have to use the opinions to coach those executives. It is challenging. Please advise.
Ask the questions in the beginning, "what do they feel and believe that person's goal and values as an executive?" If the person have communicated well with team members, it would be easier for them to provide feedback. Second, ask "what is the difference between feedback and the opinion?" Not basing on assumptions, we must make sure that their goal is to work well with the team and to become the effective leader.
Exercise
Some participants were invited to give Bill a feedback but not an opinion.
- It is hard to give the "feedback" because our natural default is to give opinions, so we need to learn how to suspend judgments
- We need to ask the person' s goals and values than we could give feedback according to that goals and values
Challenge (homework)
- Find three people and explain the difference between feedback and opinions and ask them to give you feedback.
2009/1/29
2009/1/27
AC102 Enthusing 使充滿熱情 - Part II
Facilitator: Bill Turpin
2009/1/27, 20:00~21:00
Key learning points
When we enthuse someone, we want to increase the "internal" energy, so we would use the word "inspire" instead of motivate. Motivation is external. When client takes the action, we need to ask them why they want to change? Is it coming from themselves or for others? According to the answer, we could tell whether the client is ready for "change". For example, if someone is doing something to please someone else, the person is not ready for change.
"Enthusing" is the process to help someone see their potential until they see it. Inspire them and make them think. Help them become a participator but not an observer. Coach help clients get pass the fear / take them out of the comfort zone. Coach help clients catch the opportunity when they are ready. When you pass the fears and say "I did it." and sound excited. It is a enthusing moment.
In the cartoon of Winnie the Pooh, Tigger is full of "enthusiasm". I wanna be Tigger. ^^
Discussion
Q: Anything exciting?
Q: Anything challenging? needed support?
Q: What do you mean "enthuse"?
- to excite, energize, recognize achievement, inspire, to feel passion
- help clients see the future, help them find their potential
Q: What is the difference between "cheer leading" and "enthusing"?
Cheer leading = the energy comes from coach / it might be tiring / not from clients' needs / clients do not own it. Enthusing = clients own it.
Q: What's the difference between manipulating/coercion and enthusing?
Manipulating/coercion = coach's agenda, client's change does not last long, the change comes from coach. Enthusing = client's agenda, the change lasts long, the change comes from clients
Q: Is it a "risk" that enthusing sometimes to be see as approval from coach? How to prevent that direction?
Yes. We need to be careful and minded. we don't want clients take our enthusing as approval. They need to be confident. They need to take the ownership. We might need to ask client "are you doing this because of me?" and tell client " I need you to believe in yourself without my approval."
Q: If coaching is about creating change, what is the relationship of it with enthusing?
Enthusing is the change agent / catalyst. Enthusing connects the need with the value of the client. Coaching is help client vision themselves in a bugger picture / healthier.
Q: What is something else we could do for enthusing?
- the tone of our voice
- smile would raise energy
- tell a story to inspire
- show our energy
- acknowledge their words
2009/1/27, 20:00~21:00
Key learning points
When we enthuse someone, we want to increase the "internal" energy, so we would use the word "inspire" instead of motivate. Motivation is external. When client takes the action, we need to ask them why they want to change? Is it coming from themselves or for others? According to the answer, we could tell whether the client is ready for "change". For example, if someone is doing something to please someone else, the person is not ready for change.
"Enthusing" is the process to help someone see their potential until they see it. Inspire them and make them think. Help them become a participator but not an observer. Coach help clients get pass the fear / take them out of the comfort zone. Coach help clients catch the opportunity when they are ready. When you pass the fears and say "I did it." and sound excited. It is a enthusing moment.
In the cartoon of Winnie the Pooh, Tigger is full of "enthusiasm". I wanna be Tigger. ^^
Discussion
Q: Anything exciting?
Q: Anything challenging? needed support?
Q: What do you mean "enthuse"?
- to excite, energize, recognize achievement, inspire, to feel passion
- help clients see the future, help them find their potential
Q: What is the difference between "cheer leading" and "enthusing"?
Cheer leading = the energy comes from coach / it might be tiring / not from clients' needs / clients do not own it. Enthusing = clients own it.
Q: What's the difference between manipulating/coercion and enthusing?
Manipulating/coercion = coach's agenda, client's change does not last long, the change comes from coach. Enthusing = client's agenda, the change lasts long, the change comes from clients
Q: Is it a "risk" that enthusing sometimes to be see as approval from coach? How to prevent that direction?
Yes. We need to be careful and minded. we don't want clients take our enthusing as approval. They need to be confident. They need to take the ownership. We might need to ask client "are you doing this because of me?" and tell client " I need you to believe in yourself without my approval."
Q: If coaching is about creating change, what is the relationship of it with enthusing?
Enthusing is the change agent / catalyst. Enthusing connects the need with the value of the client. Coaching is help client vision themselves in a bugger picture / healthier.
Q: What is something else we could do for enthusing?
- the tone of our voice
- smile would raise energy
- tell a story to inspire
- show our energy
- acknowledge their words
FC107 Power Listing 活力傾聽 - Part II
Facilitator: Sherry Read
2009/1/26, 20:00~21:00
Key learning points
Coaching over phone could be more convenient for coach to take notes for better memorize the context. When we notice that something comes up 3-4 times, that is the thing we need to talk. We want someone to feel being heard for making the connection, but taking notes might cut the connection. That's why sometimes, phone is better than face to face coaching.
Behaviours in powerful listening
- Mirroring : reflect back as perfectly as possible, use clients' words
- Paraphrasing : use our perspective and words, "What I heard you were saying...."
Checking their feelings
- I have heard a lot emotional words, would you like to say something more about it?
When coach says "I am hearing that you....", we provide a room for clients to correct if we hear it wrongly. It also provides a feeling of "not judging".
Listen from the heart.
Discussion
Q: Close your eyes and think about a person in your life. Who's made him/her a good listener?
- Ask a lot of questions, for a deeper conversation (questioning skills - funnel technique)
- Let the person talk and let everything out
- Be patient, give time and space
- An important step for coach to take - silence (use W.A.I.T. = why am I talking to remind ourselves)
Q: If our client says something which makes us uncomfortable (relate to our personal experience or feeling), what could we do?
- Take a short break, recentered to deep breathing
- Being aware of our feeling (what's going on with me?)
- About share our experience or story with our client: we must pay attention and ask ourselves, "when I share, is it for them? or for me?" For them, yes, we may empowering them and help them.
2009/1/26, 20:00~21:00
Key learning points
Coaching over phone could be more convenient for coach to take notes for better memorize the context. When we notice that something comes up 3-4 times, that is the thing we need to talk. We want someone to feel being heard for making the connection, but taking notes might cut the connection. That's why sometimes, phone is better than face to face coaching.
Behaviours in powerful listening
- Mirroring : reflect back as perfectly as possible, use clients' words
- Paraphrasing : use our perspective and words, "What I heard you were saying...."
Checking their feelings
- I have heard a lot emotional words, would you like to say something more about it?
When coach says "I am hearing that you....", we provide a room for clients to correct if we hear it wrongly. It also provides a feeling of "not judging".
Listen from the heart.
Discussion
Q: Close your eyes and think about a person in your life. Who's made him/her a good listener?
- Ask a lot of questions, for a deeper conversation (questioning skills - funnel technique)
- Let the person talk and let everything out
- Be patient, give time and space
- An important step for coach to take - silence (use W.A.I.T. = why am I talking to remind ourselves)
Q: If our client says something which makes us uncomfortable (relate to our personal experience or feeling), what could we do?
- Take a short break, recentered to deep breathing
- Being aware of our feeling (what's going on with me?)
- About share our experience or story with our client: we must pay attention and ask ourselves, "when I share, is it for them? or for me?" For them, yes, we may empowering them and help them.
2009/1/26
FC102 Perspective 觀點 - Part II
Facilitator: Bill Turpin
2009/1/22, 20:00-21:00
Key learning points
Perspective (point of view) is essential to coaching. Perspective is the way of seeing life or interpreting a particular situation. Perspective is a choice of how we see or interpret something. Your perspective determines your experience of life, not your circumstances. Why are two people in same circumstances, but have different experience? It is because of they have different perspectives. An empowering perspective provides a better experience.
We need to support our clients reframe a disempowering perspective to an empowering one. Sometimes they hold on a perspective because it works for themselves. There's a payback to them. We could not force them to change. They need to make the decision to change. An example of "reframing" - When life hands you a lemon, make it a lemonade." Reframing is an art, seeing things from a new eye & different direction.
Reframing = choose what it means to you and what is good to you. Reframing is more than looking the bright side of things. We need new perspectives to sense the possibility of changing our experience. Clients see problems, we (coach) see potentials. We need to ask ourselves, "when we see others, we see problems or potentials?" "Reframing" is a powerful changing strategy.
Failure is only a "moment", not a "monument". Life is about learning, learning from your mistakes. You cannot have life testimony unless you come through the tests; you cannot have life message unless you come out of mess.
Reframe does not equal to "denial". Reframe = clients understand, take the responsibility and take the action to face the circumstances. When we choose reframing, we are choosing freedom and make a difference. Denial = escape, blame, not take responsibility. When we choose denial, we are choosing burden and no change.
When coaching, take the real pieces of the client's life. Help clients choose how to respond the reality, the events. It takes a little bit practice to get this habit of reframing and recognize that we could choose our perspectives of life.
Discussion
Q: Anything exciting that we could share with you? Share with us.
Q: How would you define/describe perspective to other?
- choice of attitude
- glasses to see the life
- the way you look at something
Q: Does perspective equal to core value?
No.
- core values shapes the perspectives
- perspective is the way to see/ treat core values (different people would have different ways a point of views to a same core value)
Q: How many of you, when you first attend ICA, and you wonder the effectiveness of the teleclass?
- A good coach has to be a good listener. Teleclass is for practicing the "listening skills". It provides great time of reflection. As a coach, we listen 80%, and talk 20% in a coaching session.
2009/1/22, 20:00-21:00
Key learning points
Perspective (point of view) is essential to coaching. Perspective is the way of seeing life or interpreting a particular situation. Perspective is a choice of how we see or interpret something. Your perspective determines your experience of life, not your circumstances. Why are two people in same circumstances, but have different experience? It is because of they have different perspectives. An empowering perspective provides a better experience.
We need to support our clients reframe a disempowering perspective to an empowering one. Sometimes they hold on a perspective because it works for themselves. There's a payback to them. We could not force them to change. They need to make the decision to change. An example of "reframing" - When life hands you a lemon, make it a lemonade." Reframing is an art, seeing things from a new eye & different direction.
Reframing = choose what it means to you and what is good to you. Reframing is more than looking the bright side of things. We need new perspectives to sense the possibility of changing our experience. Clients see problems, we (coach) see potentials. We need to ask ourselves, "when we see others, we see problems or potentials?" "Reframing" is a powerful changing strategy.
Failure is only a "moment", not a "monument". Life is about learning, learning from your mistakes. You cannot have life testimony unless you come through the tests; you cannot have life message unless you come out of mess.
Reframe does not equal to "denial". Reframe = clients understand, take the responsibility and take the action to face the circumstances. When we choose reframing, we are choosing freedom and make a difference. Denial = escape, blame, not take responsibility. When we choose denial, we are choosing burden and no change.
When coaching, take the real pieces of the client's life. Help clients choose how to respond the reality, the events. It takes a little bit practice to get this habit of reframing and recognize that we could choose our perspectives of life.
Discussion
Q: Anything exciting that we could share with you? Share with us.
Q: How would you define/describe perspective to other?
- choice of attitude
- glasses to see the life
- the way you look at something
Q: Does perspective equal to core value?
No.
- core values shapes the perspectives
- perspective is the way to see/ treat core values (different people would have different ways a point of views to a same core value)
Q: How many of you, when you first attend ICA, and you wonder the effectiveness of the teleclass?
- A good coach has to be a good listener. Teleclass is for practicing the "listening skills". It provides great time of reflection. As a coach, we listen 80%, and talk 20% in a coaching session.
2009/1/22
IF106 Trial Session 體驗課程 - Part II
Facilitator: Bill Turpin
2009/1/21, 19:00-20:00
接續上週的主題, 今天換了一個老師. 一開始, 他邀請同學們分享最近有什麼好消息, something exciting in life, 讓我們一起為那位同學慶賀!! 這是一個很棒的開始. 以後可以應用在工作上 (比如說每週跟同事們開會的時候). 課程結束之前老師帶領我們做一個 trial session 的練習. 讓我們體驗什麼叫做 trial session.
學習重點
* It's a lot easier to give a coaching experience but not an education. What kind of experience you want to give your clients and yourself?
* The trial session is not just for client. It's also for the coach. We need to know whether we are suitable for each other.
*Goals are only step stones for what we really want!!
問題討論
1. 如何將 trial session 轉換成為正式的 coaching session?
Answer:
(1) 一開始就設立規範 (提供客戶所需的所有資訊), 讓客戶有心理準備.
(2) 我們希望 trial session 達到什麼樣的結果
(3) 在 trial session 進行一半時, 提醒客戶之前已經說好的規範, 並進一步討論.
(4) 設定自己的 rate, 向客戶提出建議. 看看客戶是否能夠接受
(5) 如果客戶目前無法接受, 請客戶推薦其他潛在客戶
2. 如果trial session 結束, 我們發現客戶不適合我們, 該怎麼辦?
Answer: 告訴客戶我們關心他, 所以它需要一個更適合他的人
3. Trial Session 規範的彈性?
Answer:
(1) Trial Session 是一個投資. 由 coach 自行決定
(2) 很重要的是, 我們在 trial session 提供 coaching 體驗, 而不是 coaching 知識/教育.
(3) 提供 coaching 體驗比 coaching 知識/教育來的簡單許多
(4) 在 trial session 中我們想要為客戶及自己, 創造什麼樣的體驗?
(5) Trial session 中建立的觀點: 客戶想要僱用我們 vs 我們想要被僱用
4. 參考開場白
(1) Ask them, do they have 10 minutes? If they do, "I would like to give you the experience of coaching. Coaching is about supporting but you need to care about it first (ownership).
(2) 感謝您願意花時間體驗 coaching, 既然您已經願意體驗, 在這個 30~60 分鐘的 trial session 完成之後, 你想要獲得什麼?"
(3) 讓客戶主導談話, empower / enthuse /encourage 客戶, 讓客戶設定他們的 agenda.
5. 體驗型的 trial session 示範
請客戶畫五個正方形由左至右, 將他們編號 1~5
(1) 請問您個人有什麼目標想要達成?
(2) 請問您的這個目標已經存在幾年?
(3) 請問, 到目前為止, 達成這個目標的最大障礙是什麼? (我們有沒有找藉口? 或者怪罪別人? 到底誰該負起責任?)
(4) 在過去的 24 小時, 你有採取任何具體行動, 以達成這個目標? (通常會引起客戶的緊張感, 想要強調的是 commitment)
(5) 如果這個目標達成了, 你會是什麼樣子? 會有什麼感受?
(6) 看看您剛剛寫下的內容. 那真的是你的目標嗎? 這個過程是否增加了個人意識?
*提醒客戶, I can't do it for you. You need to take the ownership. 大部分的情況是, 我們(包括客戶) 都很可能擁有一個目標好幾年.
2009/1/21, 19:00-20:00
接續上週的主題, 今天換了一個老師. 一開始, 他邀請同學們分享最近有什麼好消息, something exciting in life, 讓我們一起為那位同學慶賀!! 這是一個很棒的開始. 以後可以應用在工作上 (比如說每週跟同事們開會的時候). 課程結束之前老師帶領我們做一個 trial session 的練習. 讓我們體驗什麼叫做 trial session.
學習重點
* It's a lot easier to give a coaching experience but not an education. What kind of experience you want to give your clients and yourself?
* The trial session is not just for client. It's also for the coach. We need to know whether we are suitable for each other.
*Goals are only step stones for what we really want!!
問題討論
1. 如何將 trial session 轉換成為正式的 coaching session?
Answer:
(1) 一開始就設立規範 (提供客戶所需的所有資訊), 讓客戶有心理準備.
(2) 我們希望 trial session 達到什麼樣的結果
(3) 在 trial session 進行一半時, 提醒客戶之前已經說好的規範, 並進一步討論.
(4) 設定自己的 rate, 向客戶提出建議. 看看客戶是否能夠接受
(5) 如果客戶目前無法接受, 請客戶推薦其他潛在客戶
2. 如果trial session 結束, 我們發現客戶不適合我們, 該怎麼辦?
Answer: 告訴客戶我們關心他, 所以它需要一個更適合他的人
3. Trial Session 規範的彈性?
Answer:
(1) Trial Session 是一個投資. 由 coach 自行決定
(2) 很重要的是, 我們在 trial session 提供 coaching 體驗, 而不是 coaching 知識/教育.
(3) 提供 coaching 體驗比 coaching 知識/教育來的簡單許多
(4) 在 trial session 中我們想要為客戶及自己, 創造什麼樣的體驗?
(5) Trial session 中建立的觀點: 客戶想要僱用我們 vs 我們想要被僱用
4. 參考開場白
(1) Ask them, do they have 10 minutes? If they do, "I would like to give you the experience of coaching. Coaching is about supporting but you need to care about it first (ownership).
(2) 感謝您願意花時間體驗 coaching, 既然您已經願意體驗, 在這個 30~60 分鐘的 trial session 完成之後, 你想要獲得什麼?"
(3) 讓客戶主導談話, empower / enthuse /encourage 客戶, 讓客戶設定他們的 agenda.
5. 體驗型的 trial session 示範
請客戶畫五個正方形由左至右, 將他們編號 1~5
(1) 請問您個人有什麼目標想要達成?
(2) 請問您的這個目標已經存在幾年?
(3) 請問, 到目前為止, 達成這個目標的最大障礙是什麼? (我們有沒有找藉口? 或者怪罪別人? 到底誰該負起責任?)
(4) 在過去的 24 小時, 你有採取任何具體行動, 以達成這個目標? (通常會引起客戶的緊張感, 想要強調的是 commitment)
(5) 如果這個目標達成了, 你會是什麼樣子? 會有什麼感受?
(6) 看看您剛剛寫下的內容. 那真的是你的目標嗎? 這個過程是否增加了個人意識?
*提醒客戶, I can't do it for you. You need to take the ownership. 大部分的情況是, 我們(包括客戶) 都很可能擁有一個目標好幾年.
About Peer Coaching
Hi all,
I just read the document of "Peer coaching". It suggests us to complete 12 weeks classes and being coached by a Senior ICA coach for 12 sessions that we could begin the practice as a Coach. Therefore, I am thinking that maybe we could begin the coaching among us later, after we reach the study progress. On the other hand, to experience being coached by different ICA students, I have registered to be client on the discussion board. Maybe you could try it as well. I believe that it could bring us more inspiration.
I just read the document of "Peer coaching". It suggests us to complete 12 weeks classes and being coached by a Senior ICA coach for 12 sessions that we could begin the practice as a Coach. Therefore, I am thinking that maybe we could begin the coaching among us later, after we reach the study progress. On the other hand, to experience being coached by different ICA students, I have registered to be client on the discussion board. Maybe you could try it as well. I believe that it could bring us more inspiration.
This is a leader
年終尾牙聚餐的時候, 我們部門的協理獲得最佳服務獎. 之後, 他寫了一封信給部門同仁, 我想這是一個非常好的 leader 典範, 也充分展現 coaching 精神. 與大家分享.
新年快樂!!
Dear all,
I was completed stunned when the Chairman called out "OOO" at the IFS & SPA's joint year-end banquet last Friday night. My first thought was "Is there someone else in our firm also named "OOO?" Best service?! I have no recollection of what extraordinary thing I have ever done deserved to be in that category. Everything I have done, I should have.
In fact, I think most of you deserve the recognition more than I do. Consider how many people you know in the firm and how many client you serve face-to-face, over the phone, or via emails, every day. Definitely more than the number I do. So, I came to the conclusion that the honor should go to all of us at L&D. I am merely a representative for that recognition.
Besides, if I had done something so impressive to our clients to be named for the honor, I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU - your support, assistance, understanding and patience. I owe it to every one of you. So, THANK YOU! The treat this afternoon is simply a tiny token of my appreciation. Know that my gratitude and humility weigh much and much more than that.
If there's any tip I could share, let's "live" the 4 PwC Experience behaviors to the fullest. Always, and I mean, "always" to put ourselves in others' shoes, and to focus on enhancing "values" of our clients and ourselves. Dream big, plan ahead, hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Love what you do!
Best,
Anny
新年快樂!!
Dear all,
I was completed stunned when the Chairman called out "OOO" at the IFS & SPA's joint year-end banquet last Friday night. My first thought was "Is there someone else in our firm also named "OOO?" Best service?! I have no recollection of what extraordinary thing I have ever done deserved to be in that category. Everything I have done, I should have.
In fact, I think most of you deserve the recognition more than I do. Consider how many people you know in the firm and how many client you serve face-to-face, over the phone, or via emails, every day. Definitely more than the number I do. So, I came to the conclusion that the honor should go to all of us at L&D. I am merely a representative for that recognition.
Besides, if I had done something so impressive to our clients to be named for the honor, I COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT YOU - your support, assistance, understanding and patience. I owe it to every one of you. So, THANK YOU! The treat this afternoon is simply a tiny token of my appreciation. Know that my gratitude and humility weigh much and much more than that.
If there's any tip I could share, let's "live" the 4 PwC Experience behaviors to the fullest. Always, and I mean, "always" to put ourselves in others' shoes, and to focus on enhancing "values" of our clients and ourselves. Dream big, plan ahead, hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. Love what you do!
Best,
Anny
Remember who you really are !
Playing House in the White House
By JENNA and BARBARA BUSH
Sasha and Malia, we were seven when our beloved grandfather was sworn in as the 41st President of the United States. We stood proudly on the platform, our tiny hands icicles, as we lived history. We listened intently to the words spoken on Inauguration Day service, duty, honor. But being seven, we didn't quite understand the gravity of the position our Grandfather was committing to. We watched as the bands marched by -- the red, white, and blue streamers welcoming us to a new role: the family members of a President.
We also first saw the White House through the innocent, optimistic eyes of children. We stood on the North Lawn gazing with wonder at her grand portico. The White House was alive with devoted and loving people, many of whom had worked in her halls for decades. Three of the White House ushers, Buddy, Ramsey, and "Smiley", greeted us when we stepped into her intimidating hallway. Their laughter and embraces made us feel welcome right away. Sasha and Malia, here is some advice to you from two sisters who have stood where you will stand and who have lived where you will live:
-- Surround yourself with loyal friends. They'll protect and calm you and join in on some of the fun, and appreciate the history.
-- If you're traveling with your parents over Halloween, don't let it stop you from doing what you would normally do. Dress up in some imaginative, elaborate costume (if you are like us a pack of Juicy Fruit and a Vampiress) and trick-or-treat down the plane aisle.
-- If you ever need a hug, go find Ramsey. If you want to talk football, look for Buddy. And, if you just need a smile, look for "Smiley."
-- And, a note on White House puppies--our sweet puppy Spot was nursed on the lawn of the White House. And then of course, there's Barney, who most recently bit a reporter. Cherish your animals because sometimes you'll need the quiet comfort that only animals can provide.
-- Slide down the banister of the solarium, go to T-ball games, have swimming parties, and play Sardines on the White House lawn. Have fun and enjoy your childhood in such a magical place to live and play.
-- When your dad throws out the first pitch for the Yankees, go to the game.
-- In fact, go to anything and everything you possibly can: the Kennedy Center for theater, State Dinners, Christmas parties (the White House staff party is our favorite!), museum openings, arrival ceremonies, and walks around the monuments. Just go. Four years goes by so fast, so absorb it all, enjoy it all!
For four years, we spent our childhood holidays and vacations in the historic house. We could almost feel the presence of all the great men and women who had lived here before us. When we played house, we sat behind the East sitting room's massive curtains as the light poured in illuminating her yellow walls. Our seven-year-old imaginations soared as we played in the enormous, beautiful rooms; our dreams, our games, as romantic as her surroundings. At night, the house sang us quiet songs through the chimneys as we fell asleep.
In late December, when snow blanketed the front lawn, all of our cousins overtook the White House. Thirteen children between the ages of two and 12 ran throughout her halls, energized by the crispness in the air and the spirit of the season. Every room smelled of pine; the entire house was adorned with thistle; garlands wound around every banister. We sat on her grand staircase and spied on the holiday dancing below. Hours were spent playing hide-and-go-seek. We used a stage in the grand ballroom to produce a play about Santa and his reindeer. We watched as the National Christmas Tree was lit and admired the chef as he put the final icing on the gingerbread house.
When it was time, we left the White House. We said our goodbyes to her and to Washington. We weren't sure if we would spend time among her historical walls again, or ever walk the National Mall, admiring the cherry blossoms that resembled puffs of cotton candy. But we did return. This time we were 18. The White House welcomed us back and there is no doubt that it is a magical place at any age.
As older girls, we were constantly inspired by the amazing people we met, politicians and great philosophers like Vaclav Havel. We dined with royalty, heads of states, authors, and activists. We even met the Queen of England and managed to see the Texas Longhorns after they won the National Championship. We traveled with our parents to foreign lands and were deeply moved by what we saw. Trips to Africa inspired and motivated us to begin working with HIV/AIDS and the rights of women and children all over the world.
Now, the White House ballrooms were filled with energy and music as we danced. The East sitting room became a peaceful place to read and study. We ran on the track in the front lawn, and squared off in sisterly bowling duels down in the basement alley.
This Christmas, with the enchanting smell of the holidays encompassing her halls, we will again be saying our good-byes to the White House. Sasha and Malia, it is your turn now to fill the White House with laughter.
And finally, although it's an honor and full of so many extraordinary opportunities, it isn't always easy being a member of the club you are about to join. Our dad, like yours, is a man of great integrity and love; a man who always put us first. We still see him now as we did when we were seven: as our loving daddy. Our Dad, who read to us nightly, taught us how to score tedious baseball games. He is our father, not the sketch in a paper or part of a skit on TV. Many people will think they know him, but they have no idea how he felt the day you were born, the pride he felt on your first day of school, or how much you both love being his daughters. So here is our most important piece of advice: remember who your dad really is.
By JENNA and BARBARA BUSH
Sasha and Malia, we were seven when our beloved grandfather was sworn in as the 41st President of the United States. We stood proudly on the platform, our tiny hands icicles, as we lived history. We listened intently to the words spoken on Inauguration Day service, duty, honor. But being seven, we didn't quite understand the gravity of the position our Grandfather was committing to. We watched as the bands marched by -- the red, white, and blue streamers welcoming us to a new role: the family members of a President.
We also first saw the White House through the innocent, optimistic eyes of children. We stood on the North Lawn gazing with wonder at her grand portico. The White House was alive with devoted and loving people, many of whom had worked in her halls for decades. Three of the White House ushers, Buddy, Ramsey, and "Smiley", greeted us when we stepped into her intimidating hallway. Their laughter and embraces made us feel welcome right away. Sasha and Malia, here is some advice to you from two sisters who have stood where you will stand and who have lived where you will live:
-- Surround yourself with loyal friends. They'll protect and calm you and join in on some of the fun, and appreciate the history.
-- If you're traveling with your parents over Halloween, don't let it stop you from doing what you would normally do. Dress up in some imaginative, elaborate costume (if you are like us a pack of Juicy Fruit and a Vampiress) and trick-or-treat down the plane aisle.
-- If you ever need a hug, go find Ramsey. If you want to talk football, look for Buddy. And, if you just need a smile, look for "Smiley."
-- And, a note on White House puppies--our sweet puppy Spot was nursed on the lawn of the White House. And then of course, there's Barney, who most recently bit a reporter. Cherish your animals because sometimes you'll need the quiet comfort that only animals can provide.
-- Slide down the banister of the solarium, go to T-ball games, have swimming parties, and play Sardines on the White House lawn. Have fun and enjoy your childhood in such a magical place to live and play.
-- When your dad throws out the first pitch for the Yankees, go to the game.
-- In fact, go to anything and everything you possibly can: the Kennedy Center for theater, State Dinners, Christmas parties (the White House staff party is our favorite!), museum openings, arrival ceremonies, and walks around the monuments. Just go. Four years goes by so fast, so absorb it all, enjoy it all!
For four years, we spent our childhood holidays and vacations in the historic house. We could almost feel the presence of all the great men and women who had lived here before us. When we played house, we sat behind the East sitting room's massive curtains as the light poured in illuminating her yellow walls. Our seven-year-old imaginations soared as we played in the enormous, beautiful rooms; our dreams, our games, as romantic as her surroundings. At night, the house sang us quiet songs through the chimneys as we fell asleep.
In late December, when snow blanketed the front lawn, all of our cousins overtook the White House. Thirteen children between the ages of two and 12 ran throughout her halls, energized by the crispness in the air and the spirit of the season. Every room smelled of pine; the entire house was adorned with thistle; garlands wound around every banister. We sat on her grand staircase and spied on the holiday dancing below. Hours were spent playing hide-and-go-seek. We used a stage in the grand ballroom to produce a play about Santa and his reindeer. We watched as the National Christmas Tree was lit and admired the chef as he put the final icing on the gingerbread house.
When it was time, we left the White House. We said our goodbyes to her and to Washington. We weren't sure if we would spend time among her historical walls again, or ever walk the National Mall, admiring the cherry blossoms that resembled puffs of cotton candy. But we did return. This time we were 18. The White House welcomed us back and there is no doubt that it is a magical place at any age.
As older girls, we were constantly inspired by the amazing people we met, politicians and great philosophers like Vaclav Havel. We dined with royalty, heads of states, authors, and activists. We even met the Queen of England and managed to see the Texas Longhorns after they won the National Championship. We traveled with our parents to foreign lands and were deeply moved by what we saw. Trips to Africa inspired and motivated us to begin working with HIV/AIDS and the rights of women and children all over the world.
Now, the White House ballrooms were filled with energy and music as we danced. The East sitting room became a peaceful place to read and study. We ran on the track in the front lawn, and squared off in sisterly bowling duels down in the basement alley.
This Christmas, with the enchanting smell of the holidays encompassing her halls, we will again be saying our good-byes to the White House. Sasha and Malia, it is your turn now to fill the White House with laughter.
And finally, although it's an honor and full of so many extraordinary opportunities, it isn't always easy being a member of the club you are about to join. Our dad, like yours, is a man of great integrity and love; a man who always put us first. We still see him now as we did when we were seven: as our loving daddy. Our Dad, who read to us nightly, taught us how to score tedious baseball games. He is our father, not the sketch in a paper or part of a skit on TV. Many people will think they know him, but they have no idea how he felt the day you were born, the pride he felt on your first day of school, or how much you both love being his daughters. So here is our most important piece of advice: remember who your dad really is.
2009/1/21
AC102 Enthusing 使充滿熱情 - Part I
Facilitator: Kathy Munoz
2009/1/20, 20:00-21:00
Enthusing 的目的是幫助並鼓勵客戶改變. 一般日常生活當中, 我們要容易用負面的方式如 "強迫 coercion" 或者是 "罪惡感 guilt trip", 促使別人改變. Coach 應該使用正向鼓勵, 肯定的方式, 讓客戶 "自己" 願意採取行動, 這種的改變才能延續.
問題討論
1. 最近有什麼讓你覺得掙扎沮喪的事? 或是感到興奮的事?
2. 哪些正向的辭彙我們可以用在 enthusing?
3. 協助客戶燃起熱情時, 你感到自在嗎?
4. 如果我們沒辦法點燃客戶的熱情, 該怎麼辦?
5. 是否曾經使用過負面方式促使人家改變?
6. 使用負面方式 enthusing 的風險?
學習重點
2009/1/20, 20:00-21:00
Enthusing 的目的是幫助並鼓勵客戶改變. 一般日常生活當中, 我們要容易用負面的方式如 "強迫 coercion" 或者是 "罪惡感 guilt trip", 促使別人改變. Coach 應該使用正向鼓勵, 肯定的方式, 讓客戶 "自己" 願意採取行動, 這種的改變才能延續.
問題討論
1. 最近有什麼讓你覺得掙扎沮喪的事? 或是感到興奮的事?
2. 哪些正向的辭彙我們可以用在 enthusing?
3. 協助客戶燃起熱情時, 你感到自在嗎?
4. 如果我們沒辦法點燃客戶的熱情, 該怎麼辦?
5. 是否曾經使用過負面方式促使人家改變?
6. 使用負面方式 enthusing 的風險?
學習重點
- "I believe in you. 我相信你." 是非常有力量的一句話. 它給予客戶強大的支援.
- 身為 coach, 很重要的是, 我們必須隨時展現熱情, 進而感染客戶.
- 當一個人還沒準備好的時候, 不要 "逼迫 force" 他改變. 時機 timing 很重要
- 使用負面方式 enthusing 的風險: 改變不持久 / 傷害關係 / 客戶對 coach 失去信心 / 客戶感到壓力
- 瞭解客戶的需要, 採取適當的方式 enthusing.
- 客戶必須為自己負起 "改變的責任"
- 協助客戶瞭解 "採取行動" 與 "故步自封" 的結果分別如何 (讓客戶自己陳述, 不是由 coach 告知), 然後讓客戶自己決定是否要向前邁出一步 move forward.
- 用好問題, 協助客戶以不同角度與情境思考, 進而綜觀全局, 比較各種可能方案與預期結果.可以用這樣的問句: "Tell me what would happen if....". 協助客戶負起改變的責任並採取行動.
- Coach 要注意, 這一切都是為了客戶, 由客戶決定他們該往哪個方向前進, 而不是往 coach 想要的方向前進. 是客戶的目標, 不是 coach 的目標
- 也可以用客戶已經採取的行動或階段性的成就, 進行 enthusing
- 成為一個 powerful coach的重要因素 (1) 於客戶同在, 以及 (2)適當靜默
2009/1/20
FC107 Power Listing 活力傾聽 - Part I
Facilitator: Sherry Read
2009/1/19, 20:00-21:00
1. 如果有人說 : "沒有人像我的 coach 一樣傾聽我的聲音?" 對 coach 而言, 這代表了什麼意義?
2. 傾聽的時候, 要聽什麼? 要如何讓 client 覺得 coach 全心全意地傾聽?
3. 在傾聽的過程中, 如何使用 "靜默"? 要如何練習 "靜默"?
4. 用電話 coaching 的過程當中, 可以用多少比例的 "靜默"?
5. 對於 "發自內心" 的傾聽, 有什麼看法?
6. 如何不帶評斷的態度傾聽?
7. 有什麼方式可以知道自己成為更好的傾聽者?
學習重點
(1) 想一個加強傾聽技巧的方法
2009/1/19, 20:00-21:00
今天的主題是 Power Listening, 有力量的傾聽. 在傾聽的過程中, coach 必須要站在 client 的立場與觀點出發, 多聽少說. 聽與說的比例是 80% vs 20%. 透過觀察肢體語言 body language 與臉部表情 facial expression, 聆聽 client 的語調 intonation, 察覺 client 直接與間接的陳述(有沒有絃外之音?). 我們才能成為真正會傾聽的 coach.
問題討論1. 如果有人說 : "沒有人像我的 coach 一樣傾聽我的聲音?" 對 coach 而言, 這代表了什麼意義?
2. 傾聽的時候, 要聽什麼? 要如何讓 client 覺得 coach 全心全意地傾聽?
3. 在傾聽的過程中, 如何使用 "靜默"? 要如何練習 "靜默"?
4. 用電話 coaching 的過程當中, 可以用多少比例的 "靜默"?
5. 對於 "發自內心" 的傾聽, 有什麼看法?
6. 如何不帶評斷的態度傾聽?
7. 有什麼方式可以知道自己成為更好的傾聽者?
學習重點
- 當 client 陳述事情時, coach 要清楚知道他真正想表達的意思是什麼. 說了什麼(直接訊息) 或沒說什麼 (隱藏訊息)
- 一但 coach 開口, 都必須要對 client 有幫助
- 用 paraphrase (釋義,意譯,改述) 的方式讓客戶感受真的被傾聽. 不僅讓 coach 確認獲得的訊息正確, 也讓訊息更有效的重組協助 client 反思
- 提出適當的問題, 鼓勵 client 更深入地說出自己的想法與感受
- Silence (靜默): 適度的靜默可創造一個空間讓 client 分享更多, 可以讓 client and coach 多一點時間反思
- 透過電話 coaching 時, 務必事先向 client 說明 silence (靜默) 的效果與目的, 讓他們做好心理準備.
- 當 silence (靜默) 發生時, coach 不要急著馬上問問題
- 每個 client 適合或喜歡的 coaching 方式不同, silence (靜默) 的應用, 時間長短或次數, 須隨機調整
- 透過電話 coaching , intonation (語調/聲調) 是相當重要的環節. 同樣的字, 不同的語調代表不同意思與態度
- 站在 client 的立場著想, 我們才能真正用心傾聽. 也就是 (1) put ourselves in clients' shoes or (2) see the world through clients' eyes.
- 當我們對他人有期望, 或他人對我們有期望時, 比較無法客觀
- 當兩人關係比較長期或親近, 也不容易全心全意傾聽
- Coaching session 之後, 可以請客戶對 coach 的傾聽技巧提供具體 feedback
(1) 想一個加強傾聽技巧的方法
2009/1/19
AC101 Acknowledgement
What do you think are the benefits in acknowledging clients as part of the coaching relationship?
Acknowledgment comes after the client has taken action. However acknowledgment is not just about the action, it is about who the client is being while they are taking action. We acknowledge our clients for their values and their purpose and not just their activity. We cheer them on, support them to take the next step with courage, and help them to see what they did to get those results. The language we use for acknowledging someone is: “I want to acknowledge you for….”
We do not always have to acknowledge only what was successful. Many times some of the best lessons come from what did not work out well, when it did not turn out to be exactly the way we wanted it to be. As coaches, we acknowledge what it took to take action, what lessons were learned and how it will now support the client to grow and develop even further. That means we acknowledge all the steps the client is taking from beginning to end.
We can actually coach effectively by just using acknowledgement, encouragement, validation and celebration. This is a very strong statement, but it's true. If we simply help your client see and appreciate their strengths we will empower them to do better. If we acknowledge them when they are operating at their best, then we allow their “best self” to grow. When we validate them at moments of self-doubt we will drive this doubt away. To focus on what is good in their life right now and what they are doing right will often produce significant results irrespective of other techniques.
(extracted from ICA reading)
Acknowledgment comes after the client has taken action. However acknowledgment is not just about the action, it is about who the client is being while they are taking action. We acknowledge our clients for their values and their purpose and not just their activity. We cheer them on, support them to take the next step with courage, and help them to see what they did to get those results. The language we use for acknowledging someone is: “I want to acknowledge you for….”
We do not always have to acknowledge only what was successful. Many times some of the best lessons come from what did not work out well, when it did not turn out to be exactly the way we wanted it to be. As coaches, we acknowledge what it took to take action, what lessons were learned and how it will now support the client to grow and develop even further. That means we acknowledge all the steps the client is taking from beginning to end.
We can actually coach effectively by just using acknowledgement, encouragement, validation and celebration. This is a very strong statement, but it's true. If we simply help your client see and appreciate their strengths we will empower them to do better. If we acknowledge them when they are operating at their best, then we allow their “best self” to grow. When we validate them at moments of self-doubt we will drive this doubt away. To focus on what is good in their life right now and what they are doing right will often produce significant results irrespective of other techniques.
(extracted from ICA reading)
FC107 Power Listening
What are five things that a coach needs to listen for with a client?
- “The primary purpose of listening… is to truly understand the other person’s point of view, how they think and feel and how they ‘move through the world.’” (Zeus and Skiffington, 2000)
- A good coach is listening for what truly inspires a client, lightens them up, excites them, frees them, and keeps them from resignation.
- A coach then listens for what would fulfil that inspiration, and listens for what gets in the way.
- A coach listens to a client as a magnificent, extraordinary person; as their greater self, and relates to them that way.
- When a coach is working with a client, he or she is listening for not just what the client is saying but how they are saying it eg. what feelings and emotions are being expressed or withheld.
- The coach is also just as interested in what they are NOT saying as what they are. Listen for subtle changes in voice, avoidance of questions or a change in subject. Let the client know what you are really hearing, and ask if there is something more they want to say about it.
(extracted from ICA reading)
ICA 網路課程 - 上課計畫分享
Dear all,
您跟我一樣想要12 月畢業嗎? 如果我們想依計畫達成目標, 希望這封信對您有幫助.
因為個人白天要上班, 公司防火牆擋住 skype. 所以我只能晚上上課, 下班一定要準時趕回家參加課程. 所以為了讓自己有心理準備, 上星期我花了一天的時間將未來所有 tele-class 的時間排進個人schedule. 發現這不是一減簡單的事. 原則上, 從不缺席也不間斷, 每個星期上4~5 堂課(通常每天一堂, 有幾個星期一天兩堂), 也只能在 8月初將所有課程完成. (如果您不是上班族, 白天可以靈活運用, 那又另當別論.)
排課的方式是從初即到高級, FC - AC - PT - BC, 也預留時間完成閱讀. 不過為了提昇效率, 每一個 module 或多或少會 overlapping. 其中 AC200 的課延續最久. 其他還有三種別課程, Community 從現在就可以每週參加; Supervised coach 則需要登記, 目前尚未開訪適合我們的時段; Special event 就看個人喜好參與. 應該沒不是requirement.
隨信附上我的 learning log 讓大家參考, 附件中的時間是依據 ICA calendar 的標準時間呈現, 也就是紐約時間, 我們的上課時間須加上 13小時. 舉例而言, 1/16 7-8 am, New York, 是 1/16 8-9 pm ,Taipei.
希望我的時間表對您有幫助. 讓我們一起 12 月畢業吧. ^^
請大家有空來我的部落格留言, 裡面有我們台北聚會的分享喔~
Have a nice day.
您跟我一樣想要12 月畢業嗎? 如果我們想依計畫達成目標, 希望這封信對您有幫助.
因為個人白天要上班, 公司防火牆擋住 skype. 所以我只能晚上上課, 下班一定要準時趕回家參加課程. 所以為了讓自己有心理準備, 上星期我花了一天的時間將未來所有 tele-class 的時間排進個人schedule. 發現這不是一減簡單的事. 原則上, 從不缺席也不間斷, 每個星期上4~5 堂課(通常每天一堂, 有幾個星期一天兩堂), 也只能在 8月初將所有課程完成. (如果您不是上班族, 白天可以靈活運用, 那又另當別論.)
排課的方式是從初即到高級, FC - AC - PT - BC, 也預留時間完成閱讀. 不過為了提昇效率, 每一個 module 或多或少會 overlapping. 其中 AC200 的課延續最久. 其他還有三種別課程, Community 從現在就可以每週參加; Supervised coach 則需要登記, 目前尚未開訪適合我們的時段; Special event 就看個人喜好參與. 應該沒不是requirement.
隨信附上我的 learning log 讓大家參考, 附件中的時間是依據 ICA calendar 的標準時間呈現, 也就是紐約時間, 我們的上課時間須加上 13小時. 舉例而言, 1/16 7-8 am, New York, 是 1/16 8-9 pm ,Taipei.
希望我的時間表對您有幫助. 讓我們一起 12 月畢業吧. ^^
請大家有空來我的部落格留言, 裡面有我們台北聚會的分享喔~
Have a nice day.
What is leadership?
This is an article shared by a friend. Enjoy!
********************************************************************
I went on a search to become a leader.
I searched high and low. I spoke with authority. People listened. But alas, there was one who was wiser than I, and the crowd followed that individual. I sought to inspire confidence, but the crowd responded, ‘Why should we trust you?’
I postured, and I assumed the look of leadership with a countenance that flowed with confidence and pride. But many passed me by and never noticed my air of elegance.
I ran ahead of the others, pointed the way to new heights. I demonstrated that I knew the route to greatness. And then I looked back, and I was alone.
"What shall I do?’ I queried. ‘I’ve tried hard and used all that I know.’
And I sat down and pondered long. And then I listened to the voices around me. And I heard what the group was trying to accomplish. I rolled up my sleeves and joined in the work.
As we worked, I asked, ‘Are we all together in what we want to do and how to get the job done?’
I found myself encouraging the fainthearted.
I sought the ideas of those too shy to speak out.
I taught those who had little skill.
I praised those who had worked hard.
When our task was completed, one of the group turned to me and said, ’this would not have been done but for your leadership.’
At first, I said, ‘I didn’t lead. I just worked with the rest.’ And then I understood, leadership is not a goal. It’s a way of reaching a goal.
I lead best when I help others to go where we’ve decide to go.
I lead best when I help others to use themselves creatively.
I lead best when I forget about myself as a leader and focus on my group… their needs and their goals.”
Anonymous (well said!) August 15 2008 Bob Hooey - "The Power of One! You Can, Do and Will Make a Difference!"
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I went on a search to become a leader.
I searched high and low. I spoke with authority. People listened. But alas, there was one who was wiser than I, and the crowd followed that individual. I sought to inspire confidence, but the crowd responded, ‘Why should we trust you?’
I postured, and I assumed the look of leadership with a countenance that flowed with confidence and pride. But many passed me by and never noticed my air of elegance.
I ran ahead of the others, pointed the way to new heights. I demonstrated that I knew the route to greatness. And then I looked back, and I was alone.
"What shall I do?’ I queried. ‘I’ve tried hard and used all that I know.’
And I sat down and pondered long. And then I listened to the voices around me. And I heard what the group was trying to accomplish. I rolled up my sleeves and joined in the work.
As we worked, I asked, ‘Are we all together in what we want to do and how to get the job done?’
I found myself encouraging the fainthearted.
I sought the ideas of those too shy to speak out.
I taught those who had little skill.
I praised those who had worked hard.
When our task was completed, one of the group turned to me and said, ’this would not have been done but for your leadership.’
At first, I said, ‘I didn’t lead. I just worked with the rest.’ And then I understood, leadership is not a goal. It’s a way of reaching a goal.
I lead best when I help others to go where we’ve decide to go.
I lead best when I help others to use themselves creatively.
I lead best when I forget about myself as a leader and focus on my group… their needs and their goals.”
Anonymous (well said!) August 15 2008 Bob Hooey - "The Power of One! You Can, Do and Will Make a Difference!"
2009/1/18
第二次聚會 - 教練這條路
時間: 2008/12/27
地點: 跳舞咖啡廳
與會人: Chrissie, James, Sandy, Jeremy, Benjamin, Tina
這是一個風和日麗的下午, 我們坐在跳舞咖啡廳的露台上. 資深教練 Chrissie 特地來參加我們的聚會, 分享她在教練這條路上的經驗, 包括: 教練的前景如何? 該如何開始這個專業呢? 從哪裡切入? 市場又如何? 簡單的分享與討論摘要如下:
地點: 跳舞咖啡廳
與會人: Chrissie, James, Sandy, Jeremy, Benjamin, Tina
這是一個風和日麗的下午, 我們坐在跳舞咖啡廳的露台上. 資深教練 Chrissie 特地來參加我們的聚會, 分享她在教練這條路上的經驗, 包括: 教練的前景如何? 該如何開始這個專業呢? 從哪裡切入? 市場又如何? 簡單的分享與討論摘要如下:
- Consultant 提供企業解決方案, 很多的關鍵在於企業的執行力, consultant 需要對成敗負責; 相對地, coaching 的過程, client 個人要有動機並採取行動, client 要對自己負責, coach 從旁協助 client 產生改變的力量
- Coaching 與 facilitating 的過程中, 企業內部的高階主關必須 buy in 這樣觀念, 成為推動主力, 否則不容易成功.
- Coach 在 coaching 之外應該要有一個核心專業搭配 coaching, 切入 coaching. 舉例而言: HC (Human Capital 人力資產管理), OC (organizational change 組織變革) or 心理諮商
- 現在不景氣, 可以利用 2個小時的演講, 行銷 coaching 的價值與觀念. 搭配小活動互動, 最後留 20 分鐘讓大家 debriefing 學習重點與心得, 比 evaluation form 的結果更能讓 HR 或高階主管印象深刻. 請學員回去與其他同事分享, 進一步延伸課堂中的學習 (from taking to making)
- Coaching 可以幫助別人, 也可以幫助自己. 活到老, 學到老.
- Assessment Center 應該要搭配 coaching, 才能為企業留住人才
- Coaching 或者是其他學習, 都必須將 "概念" 落實, 現狀才會改變
- 安東尼羅賓說: 成功的人只會做失敗的人不願意做的事
- 一段好的關係, 往往在於擁有同樣的價值觀. 什麼是同樣的價值觀, 必須透過 "離清" 彼此價值觀的內涵與定義而真正產生共鳴. 可以透過舉例說明的方式協助釐清. 當同樣的價值觀有不一樣的內涵與定義, 將產生不一樣的 behaviors.
- 成功的定義: 什麼叫做成功? 什麼原因讓個人覺得成功?
- 人生各個方面, 像春夏秋冬一樣有高低潮. 重要的是, 在低潮時如何 surrender, 漂亮地退場
- Client 結束 coaching session 後, 能否產生 new action and behavior 為 coaching 是否成功的指標
- 可以找一個好朋友, 互相 coaching, 學習與分享
- 中國的市場: Benjamin 建議要有一個 team 一起進行, 有人負責課程, 有人負責 call 客, 講師搭配彼此的時間排課程. 透過不同的 channel 如 學校, 政府, 民營, 國營等等建立 network. 目前中國市場培訓業很火紅, 因為很缺師資.
更多學習參考
- 書籍: 匯才 - 教練小故事套書; 矽谷知名講師 - 穆景南的書; 人生的四大秘密
- 電影: 深夜加油站遇見蘇格拉底
- 課程 - 哈佛學院, 加州管理學院, Perfect Image - 陳麗卿老師
- Coaching 的其他形式: Wellness Coach, Life Style Coach
FC102 Perspective 觀點 - Part I
Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/1/15, 20:00-21:00
今天的主題是" perspective 觀點". 我們要協助 client 自覺他們自己的觀點, 進而調整 reframe 觀點. Reframe 的目的是幫助客戶正面思考 - postitive thinking, 比較容易面對個人的問題點, 找出解決方案, 然後採取行動改變現狀.
問題討論
1. 我們自己最喜歡的 perspective 是什麼? 並舉例說明
2. 為什麼我們容易握住會讓我們失去能量的觀點 (disempowering perspective)? 簡要摘錄世界各地同學對於第二個問題的分享如下:
(1) 我們對於未知, 改變或者風險會有不安全感
(2) 因為經驗不足或者不被他人了解, 而沒有信心
(3) 因為過去的失敗經驗
學習重點:
2009/1/15, 20:00-21:00
今天的主題是" perspective 觀點". 我們要協助 client 自覺他們自己的觀點, 進而調整 reframe 觀點. Reframe 的目的是幫助客戶正面思考 - postitive thinking, 比較容易面對個人的問題點, 找出解決方案, 然後採取行動改變現狀.
問題討論
1. 我們自己最喜歡的 perspective 是什麼? 並舉例說明
2. 為什麼我們容易握住會讓我們失去能量的觀點 (disempowering perspective)? 簡要摘錄世界各地同學對於第二個問題的分享如下:
(1) 我們對於未知, 改變或者風險會有不安全感
(2) 因為經驗不足或者不被他人了解, 而沒有信心
(3) 因為過去的失敗經驗
學習重點:
- 人類與動物的不同, 在於, "我們有能力思考並進而選擇." 即便是孩童也有這樣的能力. 我們可以自己選擇更好的生活/人生
- 在生命的歷程當中, 我們都需要被傾聽, 需要有人見證我們的苦痛, 了解我們的心情與感受. 一但我們覺得我們被充分傾聽, 我們才會開始想要改變, 進而採取行動
- 每件事情的發生, 都有理由. 我們試著從中學習成長, 或者找到喜悅
- 要繼續前進或者自怨自艾(停留在苦難當中) 是一種選擇. 活在當下, 不要耽溺於過去
- 當我們找到新觀點時, 不需要立即採取行動, 先跟單純地與新觀點相處
- 觀點有可能隨時間而改變, 從長期的角度看待事情, 比較容易找到正向, 讓我們有能量 empowering 的觀點. 我們要協助客戶, 用相對的觀點思考, 看事情
- 身為 coach, 我們必須成為 model
有同學問, 如果 client 表示: "你又不是我, 你怎麼會了解我的處境?" 我們該怎麼辦?
老師建議回答: "是的, 我不是你, 所以不會了解你的處境. 你願意多跟我分享你的情況嗎?" 一但客戶獲得充分的傾聽, 他們就有機會開始改變他們的觀點.
回家功課:
請大家想想自己生命當中某一個失敗的經驗, 我們那個時候所持有的觀點是什麼? 如果是現在, 我會改用什麼樣的觀點? 又會產生什麼不一樣的結果?
2009/1/14
IF106 Trial Session 體驗課程 - Part I
Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/1/14, 19:00-20:00
今天晚上第一次參加 ICA 網路課程: Trial Session 1. 參加的同學來自美國英國, 泰國, 香港, 台灣. 很巧地, 學習夥伴 James 也參加了同一個課程. ^^
老師問了幾個問題讓同學們回答, 互動
1. 參加課程 ICA 課程的原因? (讓大家互相認識)
2. 我們在 coaching 領域的經驗?
3. 是否有人已經練習過 trial Session ?
4. 請大家用一到二個英文字總結今天的學習.
我很享受這個學習過程, 從閱讀教材, 寫心得感想到參加網路課程, 心情有不一樣的轉換. 今天的課堂當中, 老師給了二個 feedback, 讓我對於 coaching 更有信心.
1) 我有 coaching 的特質與潛力
2) 在事務所教授 coaching 就像是 trial session, 因為其他部門的同事對我產生信賴感, 才願意在課後留下來, 進一步與我討論他們工作上遇見與 coaching 相關的 issue.
課程當中有一個重要的觀念, 當 prospective client 從 trial session 進入正式 coaching. 不應該稱之為 "closing a deal", 反而是 coach and coachee 之間 partnership 關係的開始.
2009/1/14, 19:00-20:00
今天晚上第一次參加 ICA 網路課程: Trial Session 1. 參加的同學來自美國英國, 泰國, 香港, 台灣. 很巧地, 學習夥伴 James 也參加了同一個課程. ^^
老師問了幾個問題讓同學們回答, 互動
1. 參加課程 ICA 課程的原因? (讓大家互相認識)
2. 我們在 coaching 領域的經驗?
3. 是否有人已經練習過 trial Session ?
4. 請大家用一到二個英文字總結今天的學習.
我很享受這個學習過程, 從閱讀教材, 寫心得感想到參加網路課程, 心情有不一樣的轉換. 今天的課堂當中, 老師給了二個 feedback, 讓我對於 coaching 更有信心.
1) 我有 coaching 的特質與潛力
2) 在事務所教授 coaching 就像是 trial session, 因為其他部門的同事對我產生信賴感, 才願意在課後留下來, 進一步與我討論他們工作上遇見與 coaching 相關的 issue.
課程當中有一個重要的觀念, 當 prospective client 從 trial session 進入正式 coaching. 不應該稱之為 "closing a deal", 反而是 coach and coachee 之間 partnership 關係的開始.
Design My Life 理想的生活
Create a picture of your ideal lifestyle. Use the questions as a guide; add your own questions. Assume money is not an issue i.e. you have plenty. You can worry about HOW to get your picture later. Now dream!
1. Self care
5 messages per week; 2000 c.c. drinking water per day; young and healthy happy body; both yoga and meditation once a week; 80% vegetarian; 100% energy; fresh air all the time; 100% peaceful time; 8-hour sleep a day; dress whatever I want.
2. Home Environment
Hawaii, Honolulu, U.S.A; apartment at the highest floor of a building; near beach; 30 minutes to downtown; friendly community; warm and sunny; big and comfortable; soft light, artworks from different countries, roses every day and smells graceful; 1人15~20坪; the apartment is as tidy as possible; I have cleaner and someone who shops and does the housework for me when I need, but sometimes I enjoy the housework; I would like to have a white Lexus for a family.
3. Relationship
I am married and I would like to have two kids, one girl and one boy. My husband and I love each other and we are committed to do our best to contribute to our relationship, family and life.
4. Friends and Family
I would like to have at least 10 friends; they would make appointments in advance and regularly; my friends are sorted in different categories; my friends are warm, open, supportive, intelligent and rich. I hope my family members and I look like friends who could share and talk everything without pressure.
5. Career
In my world, I have a job I enjoy. I would like to provide education opportunities to children in need. I enjoy communicating with influence and sharing experience with others. I would like to work with people who are intelligent, generous and committed. I would like to work 6 hours a day from home or a tea house / coffee shop. ^^
6. Enjoyment
I like to learn different languages. I would like to travel or enjoy delicious food with my family and friends. I love travelling in different countries. It would be really wonderful to travel twice a year and each travel lasting for at least two weeks in one or two stops only. I’d like to stay in a comfortable hotel, visit different scenic destinations, taste different delicious food and purchase special souvenirs and speak a different language. Adventure to me is to travel on my own but not with a group and to participate different events or learning group.
7. A Cause/Purpose
I would like to spend time with my family and help children who need the opportunities or support for education. I believe that a person could advance their life if they could be educated. I love peace, safe and healthy. I hate fight, war and unfair. Just like what I am doing now, donate some money and spend some time. If I do have much more time, I might also contribute my brain power. The legacy I would like to leave behind my death is a better learning environment for poor kids.
1. Self care
5 messages per week; 2000 c.c. drinking water per day; young and healthy happy body; both yoga and meditation once a week; 80% vegetarian; 100% energy; fresh air all the time; 100% peaceful time; 8-hour sleep a day; dress whatever I want.
2. Home Environment
Hawaii, Honolulu, U.S.A; apartment at the highest floor of a building; near beach; 30 minutes to downtown; friendly community; warm and sunny; big and comfortable; soft light, artworks from different countries, roses every day and smells graceful; 1人15~20坪; the apartment is as tidy as possible; I have cleaner and someone who shops and does the housework for me when I need, but sometimes I enjoy the housework; I would like to have a white Lexus for a family.
3. Relationship
I am married and I would like to have two kids, one girl and one boy. My husband and I love each other and we are committed to do our best to contribute to our relationship, family and life.
4. Friends and Family
I would like to have at least 10 friends; they would make appointments in advance and regularly; my friends are sorted in different categories; my friends are warm, open, supportive, intelligent and rich. I hope my family members and I look like friends who could share and talk everything without pressure.
5. Career
In my world, I have a job I enjoy. I would like to provide education opportunities to children in need. I enjoy communicating with influence and sharing experience with others. I would like to work with people who are intelligent, generous and committed. I would like to work 6 hours a day from home or a tea house / coffee shop. ^^
6. Enjoyment
I like to learn different languages. I would like to travel or enjoy delicious food with my family and friends. I love travelling in different countries. It would be really wonderful to travel twice a year and each travel lasting for at least two weeks in one or two stops only. I’d like to stay in a comfortable hotel, visit different scenic destinations, taste different delicious food and purchase special souvenirs and speak a different language. Adventure to me is to travel on my own but not with a group and to participate different events or learning group.
7. A Cause/Purpose
I would like to spend time with my family and help children who need the opportunities or support for education. I believe that a person could advance their life if they could be educated. I love peace, safe and healthy. I hate fight, war and unfair. Just like what I am doing now, donate some money and spend some time. If I do have much more time, I might also contribute my brain power. The legacy I would like to leave behind my death is a better learning environment for poor kids.
2009/1/8
FC105 Getting Started
1. What would you like to do for people? What gifts do you have to offer, as a coach, that can make people become empowered?
- I would like to help people live their life happily and positively.
- I listen to others actively. I asked open questions to help people think and take actions. I also support and encourage people in depression and further help them move forward.
2. Why are you a coach? What is the drive behind coaching for you to make things happen for people?
- I am a coach in the training programs and at work. I act as a coach to my husband, sister and friends when they need my advice.
- I am people-oriented and according to my SDI (Strength Deployment Inventory) result, I am red-blue, which means my leadership style is coaching and mentoring.
- Three specific goals: (1) by the end of June 2009, I want to complete all the readings and reflections of FC101 ~ BC109; (2) by the end of June, I want to practice at least 6 coaching session for each external client (totaled 3 clients); (3) by the end of July, I want to attend all tele-classes.
- Business structure: As a manager of Learning and Development Department, I am responsible for Coaching Culture Serial training programs in my firm. I would focus on design and deliver coaching programs as well as provide coaching and coaching advice to my colleagues.
- How many clients? Participants in the training programs are my clients. There were more than 500 in 2008.
- Revenue target: I hope to get promoted to next level, Senior Manager.
- I want to graduate from ICA (International Coach Academy) in December 2009.
- By the end of March, complete all the readings of FC101 ~ AC113 and attend tele-classes of FC101 ~ AC108. Besides, practice at least 3 coaching session for each external client (totaled 3 clients).
- My subordinates could achieve their goals in professional and personal life.
- Colleagues in different department would like to discuss coaching with me.
- External clients would like to pay a valuable price to them for my coaching service.
FC103 Effective Feedback (2)
1. Evaluate the feedback you were given. How did you respond? Was some feedback better than others? What made it so? What did you learn from this exercise?
- 1st feedback on the clean desk (Feedback: Wow, this area is so clean. / My response: It’s been clean for almost one month.)
- 2nd feedback on wearing a skirt (Feedback: You look so different than usual! Like a little girl. / My response: I tend to wear formal at work.)
- 3rd feedback on my coaching (Feedback: You have been putting a lot of efforts to help your coachee change her behavior. We could tell the significant change form her behaviors. / My response: It’s my responsibility and I would like to keep helping her perform well.)
The better feedback to me is the feedback provider gives me his/her observation with evidence objectively. I would pay attention on this for my coaching in the future. Make sure that my feedback is not personal, not emotional, opportunity finding, fact based, objective, focusing on the future, constructive, and neutral.
2. When and how might you use role-play with your clients?
When my client is stuck in a situation that he/she could not have a breakthrough, I would invite him/her to practice role-play and reverse role-play.
3. What are three situations you might encounter as a coach in which role-play could be useful?
- When a subordinate could not understand a manager’s points of view, it would be useful to practice a role-play to think and make a decision as a manager.
- In training courses, when participants do not have experience of coaching, it would be useful having role-play to practice coaching skills as coaches and coachees.
- When children disagree with parents, role-play would be useful for them to put themselves in parents’ shoes and change their perspectives.
FC103 Effective Feedback (1)
1. How do you feel about receiving feedback?
It is not easy to receive feedback from others especially when I am confident of myself. However, I prefer having feedback to being concealed to improve myself.
2. What kind of feedback has made a difference for you?
Direct feedback with evidences and suggestions has made a difference for me. I used to be a person who liked to be the focus of attention among friends or in the class. I was not aware of that I often interrupted others' conversation. One day, one of my best friends shared her observation on me and advised me that I should remind myself to keep my mouth shut and listen to others before I wanted to cut in others' talking again. It was harsh but I knew she gave me the feedback sincerely. Since then, it's been 14 years. Thanks to her, I have become a better listener and which helps me a lot in work and in coaching.
3. What is the purpose of feedback in a coaching situation?
The purpose is to help our clients to gain objective perspectives of their situation and help them to figure out a solution to change/improve that situation.
It is not easy to receive feedback from others especially when I am confident of myself. However, I prefer having feedback to being concealed to improve myself.
2. What kind of feedback has made a difference for you?
Direct feedback with evidences and suggestions has made a difference for me. I used to be a person who liked to be the focus of attention among friends or in the class. I was not aware of that I often interrupted others' conversation. One day, one of my best friends shared her observation on me and advised me that I should remind myself to keep my mouth shut and listen to others before I wanted to cut in others' talking again. It was harsh but I knew she gave me the feedback sincerely. Since then, it's been 14 years. Thanks to her, I have become a better listener and which helps me a lot in work and in coaching.
3. What is the purpose of feedback in a coaching situation?
The purpose is to help our clients to gain objective perspectives of their situation and help them to figure out a solution to change/improve that situation.
2009/1/6
FC102 Perspective (2)
About six months ago, my director asked me to review my coachees’ working efficiency and quality. One of them had some problems to perform her job well. I have been supervising her for almost one and half year. I understood that this “job (not career)” might not be the most ideal one when she joined our team. She did not have a clear plan of future. She seldom had feelings of achievements in our work due to requirements for lots of quality and details in daily work. She was frustrated. Therefore I designed a plan of coaching my coachees (including the target one).
First, I asked her to bcc me all her e-mails that I could review her process and give her some advices for improvement. Second, we had pre-work meeting every Friday for discussing our work in the following week. In the meeting we exchanged ideas and experience for better practice. Third, we had monthly studying gathering for Harvard ManageMentor. In each gathering, we used ORID to discuss a scheduled topic. We shared our reflections and how to implement the learning in work. Last, the most important one, I had arranged three performance feedback meetings with her to help her re-frame her perspectives of this job: from “Reaction” to “Action”, from “Struggle” to “Challenge” and from “Doubt” to “Commitment”.
By the end of 2008, she has showed her commitment of this work and took action to improve working process without my frequent reminders and monitoring. She told me that in 2009 she would present a new image and continue proving her determination. I am very looking forward to it. ^^
FC102 Perspective (1)
1. When have you experienced a change in your perspective? What did it take for you to change your point of view?
- When I obtained the current job as Learning and Education Manager, I had experienced a change in my perspective from a team member to a team leader. I took the challenge and responsibilities, respected my supervisor and trusted subordinates by putting myself in their shoes as well as contributed what I had and learnt to teamwork and team success.
2. How will helping your clients change their perspective make a difference in their lives?
- Changing our clients’ perspective could help them change their attitudes from negative and limited to positive and open-ended, and then further enhance their lives.
3. In your view, what are the three most powerful Perspectives from which someone could live their life?
- Respect, Contribution and Commitment
- Reaction
- My coachee (subordinate / staff / junior colleague)
- from “Reaction” to “Action”
- from “Struggle” to “Challenge”
- from “Doubt” to “Commitment”
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