2009/9/8

網路故事~新龜兔賽跑 (文章轉載)

同事跟我分享了這篇文章
用故事說道理 簡單易懂

想跟大家分享
不知道作者是誰呢?

Cheers,
Tina
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從前,有一隻烏龜和一隻兔子在互相爭辯誰跑得快。他們決定來一場比賽分高下,選定了路線,就此起跑。兔子帶頭衝出,奔馳了一陣子,眼看它已遙遙領先烏龜,心想,它可以在樹下坐一會兒,放鬆一下,然後再繼續比賽。兔子很快地在樹下就睡著了,而一路上笨手笨腳走來的烏龜則超越過它,不一會兒完成比賽,成為貨真價實的冠軍。 等兔子一覺醒來,才發覺它輸了。"這個故事給我們的啟示是:緩慢且持續的人會贏得比賽。"這是從小伴隨我們長大的龜兔賽跑故事的版本。

但最近有人告訴筆者一個更有趣的版本。
故事這麼連續下去。兔子當然因輸了比賽而倍感失望,為此他做了些缺失預防工作(根本原因解析)。它很清楚,失敗是因它太有信心,大意,以及散漫。如果它不要自認一切都是理所當然的,烏龜是不可能打敗它的。因此,它單挑烏龜再來另一場比賽,而烏龜也同意。這次,兔子全力以赴,從頭到尾,一口氣跑完,領先烏龜好幾公里。"這故事的有什麼啟示?動作快且前後一致的人將可勝過緩慢且持續的人。如果在你的工作單位有兩個人,一個緩慢,按部就班,且可靠,另一個則是動作快,且辦事還算牢靠,那麼動作快且牢靠的人會在組織中一直往上爬,陞遷的速度比那緩慢且按部就班辦事的人快。"緩慢且持續固然很好,但動作快且牢靠則更勝一籌。

這故事還沒完沒了。
這下輪到烏龜要好好檢討,它很清楚,照目前的比賽方法,它不可能擊敗兔子。它想了一會兒,然後單挑兔子再來另一場比賽,但是是在另一條稍許不同的路線上。兔子同意,然後兩者同時出發。為了確保自己立下的承諾-從頭到尾要一直快速前進,兔子飛馳而出,極速奔跑,直到碰到一條寬闊的河流。而比賽的終點就在幾公里外的河對面。兔子呆坐在那裡,一時不知怎麼辦。這時候,烏龜卻一路跚跚而來,撩入河裡,游到對岸,繼續爬行,完成比賽。"這故事的有什麼啟示?首先,辨識出你的核心競爭力,然後改變遊戲場所以適應(發揮)你的核心競爭力。在你的工作單位,如果你是一個能言善道的人,一定要想法創造機會,好好表現自己,以便讓層峰注意到你。如果你的優勢是從事分析工作,那麼你一定要做一些研究,寫一個報告,然後呈送上樓。依著自己的優勢(專長)來工作,不僅會讓上頭的人注意到你,也會創造成長和進步的機會。"

故事還沒結束。
這下子,兔子和烏龜成了惺惺相惜的好朋友。它們一起檢討,兩個都很清楚,在上一次的比賽中,它們可以表現得更好。所以,他們決定再賽一場,但這次是同隊合作。它們一起出發,這次可是兔子扛著烏龜,直到河邊。在那裡,烏龜接手,背著兔子過河。到了河對岸,兔子再次扛著烏龜,兩個一起抵達終點。比起前次,它們都感受到一種更大的成就感。"這故事的有什麼啟示?個人表現優異與擁有堅強的核心競爭力固然不錯,但除非你能在一個團隊內(與別人)同心協力,並掌控彼此間的核心競爭力,否則你的表現將永遠在標準之下,因為總有一些狀況下,你是技不如人,而別人卻幹得蠻團隊合作主要就是有關情境(權變)領導這檔事,讓具備處理某一情境能力(核心競爭力)的人當家做主。"

從這故事,我們可以學到更多我們了解,在遭逢失敗後,兔子和烏龜都沒有就此放棄。兔子決定更拼,並且投入更多的努力。在盡了全力之後,烏龜則選擇改變策略。在人的一生中,當失敗臨頭時,有時我們需更加努力。有時則需改變策略,嘗試不同的抉擇。有時候,兩者都要一起來。兔子和烏龜也學到了最關鍵的一課。當我們不再與競爭對手較力,而開始逐鹿某一情境時,我們會表現得更好。

1980年代,當古茲維塔接掌可口可樂執行長時,他面對的是百事可樂的激烈競爭,可口可樂的市場成長正被它蠶食掉。古茲維塔手下的那些管理者,把焦點全灌注在百事可樂身上,一心一意只想著一次增長百分之零點一的市場佔有率。古茲維塔決定停止與百事可樂的競爭,而改與百分之零點一的成長此一情境角逐。他問起美國人一天的平均液態食品消耗量為多少?答案是十四盎斯。可口可樂在其中有多少?答案是兩盎斯。古茲維塔說,可口可樂需要在那塊市場做大佔有率。我們的競爭對象不是百事可樂,要是佔掉市場剩餘十二盎司的水、茶、咖啡、牛奶及果汁。當大家想要喝一點什麼時,應該是去找可口可樂。為達此目的,可口可樂在每一街頭擺上販賣機,銷售量因此節節上升,百事可樂從此再也追趕不上。

結論:龜兔賽跑的故事啟發我們良多。
最重要的是:動作快且前後一致的人總是勝過緩慢且持續的人;依著自己的優勢(專長)來工作;結合所有的資源且團隊合作的人,總是打敗單打獨鬥者;面對失敗時,絕不輕言放棄;最後,與某一情境競爭,而不是限定某對手。

PT109 - Action vs. Delay (2)

Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/7/27 & 8/3


Have someone volunteer to be coached for one of the listed item.
Q: What don’t you tell me what you would like to be coached this morning?
A – Delaying in peer coaching as a client or a coach.
Q: Have you done anything yet in that regard?
Q: Is there any particular reasons that you haven’t done any of those things?
Q: What motions do you feel when you take that action?
Q: Have you come up any ideas or strategies that you could find the client in the business fields that you are familiar with?
Q: Do you feel it might be helpful to write down things that you could like to tell them?
Q: Do you have anything in mind that you want to write down on that list?
Q: Would you be delivering those in brochure or you are just telling them?
Q: Where could you get the list of those business people?
Q: It seems that you know pretty much what to do. Do you think it’s helpful for you to write down an action plan today?
Q: Would you like to tell me your immediate plan to get two peer clients?
Q: How about your external clients? What action you would take to find them?
Q: That sounds like a very exciting plan.

Feedforward from
- He was dancing around but she challenges him in a gentle way.
- It’s an acknowledgement when asking client “what have you done?”
- Ask the reason why the actions not be taken. (UAC)
- Help him brainstorm some action that he could take. She does not focus on what he does not want to do and discuss about what could he do?
- She asked his actions about his delay.

Hard cookie
- Stubborn and determined kid.

Fieldwork:
When you take the action (small actions) for things you are delaying, there would be a new awareness or new circumstances in the process for you.

PT109 - Action vs. Delay (1)

Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/7/27 & 8/3

Exercise
Write down three things you are delaying in your life right now.
- Having babies
- Taking a real break
- Volunteer work

What is the difference between the lists of delay and priority?
- It is not that one perspective is better than the other one, but one is more powerful than the other one.

How do you recognize that you are delaying?
- There are so many actions I am taking now in my life, so the delay happens when I prioritize the things. However, the delay might be the item is not needed to be done right away.

Is there any pattern that you delay?
- When things are out off my comfort zone – unpleasant or not fun (mainly I don’t like change)
- When it does not involve anyone else.
- When only I am the only responsible person for the work, I could consciously delay and ask others to join the work.
- When I am confident that there is no immediate urgency, so I would delay it for a while and than take the action before the deadline.

Reasons for delay
- Fear, not knowing where to started, not having it before, become to significant about something.

PT108 - Game vs Significance

Facilitator: Sherry Read
2009/5/13 & 5/20


It’s about changing perspectives.

Can we separate Significance from importance?
“I have to get this job.” - When we get that significance, are we really acting in truth?

When we talk about game, we are not making fun of it. We just try to find another way to perceive and get the desired result. (How do you lighten it up?)

My coaching session is like a game. It’s about making my client move forward. They win and I don’t loose.

“Game” breaks down barriers of movements and thoughts.
How do you turn “housework” into “game”?
- “I need her helping.” vs “How can I bring her alone?”

How to make an adult to get things done? How do we shift that mind?

Is there any reason why I can’t? Is there any reason why we can’t?

Games bring the energy, shift into energy.
Think about things I want, instead of I have to. It’s all about find the perspective that helpful. Open up new possibilities.

Where do yo think we could use this power tool in coaching?

Where could you find your client is getting into significance?

The game of finding clients
The game of attracting people
The game of achieving the goal
O.K., let’s see what would be going on? (What can I add in the list today that I have no idea what would happened?)

How do you change the rules to pull forward from stuck?

PT107 Truth vs. Fraud (3)

Facilitator: Prabha Chandrasekhar
2009/4/29 & 5/6

If we don’t speck of truth, what would be the outcome?
- We Cheer ourselves and others.

Why do we not tell the truth? Why?
- If it is that we want to avoid the conflicts, what could we ask our clients? (What are the negative or positive outcomes? What are the long term consequences of not telling the truth?) (How do you face and handle the truth when people tell the truth to you?)

How do we coach people to tell the truth wisely?
- Think about how to choose the word.
- Starting from looking at the questions of confrontation and looking into the intention. Do you intend to confront or not?

Help the person to release and believe the outcome of telling the truth even we cannot control another person’s responds. (In reality we cannot control the other person’s reaction.)
Do not lie in a relationship. Tell the truth as soon as possible. We should not mislead the situation. Telling the person at this moment, I am comfortable to be friends. (Own the power of your action and words, and be responsible for what you say and do.)

How do we help people pass fear? And move toward trust and released.
How to keep the feeling of compassion, trust and believe the other party?
Is it a right thing to do “withhold”?
- Before you answer this question yourself or tell a person the truth. We need to think of the possible reaction/outcome of the clients. If we could control the situation, we could tell the truth. On the other way, I might tell a story to test the person. Tell the truth step by step.
- Test with a little question first to see if they are ready for the truth.
- I would help my client to find their own truth on their own first by using questions and reflections. It’s more powerful than that I tell the truth to them.

PT107 Truth vs. Fraud (2)

Facilitator: Prabha Chandrasekhar
2009/4/29 & 5/6


When we have a client who is going through from this (above), what kind of questions we could ask to bring their awareness and take care themselves?
- Why not tell the truth? What would happen if you tell the truth?

Sometimes we would assume that I was hurt by this before and I would not hurt the others with this. For example, when we were children and we told the truth but we got punished, so we decided not to tell the truth anymore. We are not adult now and we would not get punished. Ask them why they feel it that way. Ask them why it happen but tell them that they are a different person now. They need to think of themselves and take care of themselves. We have the choice now and every moment is a new opportunity.

I need to behave in certain way due to the social environment. What about this kind of client? How can we take them move forward?
- Ask them what stopping them to do so. What is holding them?
- What are the consequence if others listen to you without any assumption?
- If they listen to you without assumptions, what would you say?

“Do you know who you are when you are the true self?”
Ask the question and ask client how they feel and how they are in that situation (give them sometime), and then ask they want stop them to be that person.

Do you think others are also hiding information from you? How would this help the process?
- The other person withholds the information to me and I don’t trust them. They lose the trust from me. It could bring up the awareness.
- Ask “How would you see the person if you withhold the information?”

As a coach, how can we help the manager of the company to see what’s happening. (A company to be merged)
- Make sure the information going to employee are truthful, even there’s a risk.
- What would the management get in return? (cooperation, trust)

Being truthful, trust is the biggest winner even it’s difficult. Because truth help the person know what’s the real situation.

PT107 Truth vs. Fraud (1)

Facilitator: Prabha Chandrasekhar 2009/4/29 & 5/6

What is truth?
- live aligning with my valuing, honor myself
- self-awareness, my perspective is truthful to myself, why and how I feel
- transparent, not hiding omitting

What is fraud?
- We know that information but we know that if we share we might get hurt and then we hide it, would that be a fraud? Yes.
- Withhold information and they get a better deal and the other person losses out, would that be fraud also?

What you are working with truth, how do you know that this tool could help the client? Why people want to stay away from truth?
- When the client does not want to hurt or disappoint the others. Or they would be looked down and not be accepted.
- When they don’t want to take the responsibility might happened
- When they don’t want to be blamed
- What they don’t trust or have doubt, they don’t tell the truth.

When the above situation happens, is it possible there is a UAC?

Do you think we have a choice?
- We do have a choice but we need to balance the practical goal.
- We need to know what our boundaries are (how far I would go for it? What are the consequences?), and we could decide how we behave in different situation.

What if we are not treated truthfully and we do not feel comfortable, how could we take care of ourselves? What do we need to do and coach ourselves for that?
- Forgive myself, I have done my best and prepare to what might happen in future again.

PT103 - Responsibility vs. Blame (2)

Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/8/24 & 8/31

Look back the situation, what are the effects of that situation when you were blaming?
- It’s all about me. Offensive
- Cause anxiety
- No true dialogue

Opposite Exercise: a time you took the responsibility, what supported you to take responsibility? (It does not mean that, “It’s all my faults.”)
- Change perspectives
- Humbleness to review ourselves
- Support from books, tools, or others
- Review our expectation: What are my expectations here?
- Look at the situation objectively

If you are working with clients, what do you want to make sure there to support them?
- Honest feedback (based on facts but not compassion)

Example of dancing
- With each dancing partners, most of time they are in blame mode of what did you do that? But someone take responsibility, they would just move on and enjoy the moment

There are more opportunities to learn and joyment when are take responsible. When are take responsibility, we also give others opportunities to take responsibility. We would be more proactive to control the situation.

Blaming just keeps us in the past.
Can you think of any benefits brought by blame? Blame would create boundary.

Exercise
What do you notice the major differences when you take responsibility and when you are blaming in your life? What could we put in place to go forward and set ourselves free?

Think of something that we could prevent blaming. Stop taking too much, review the expectation.

PT103 - Responsibility vs. Blame (1)

Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/8/24 & 8/31

Provide many different perspectives of situation to bring up the awareness of role at current job.

What are the things were asked or done that helped client to take responsibility?
- How long is the program and how far she still have to go to bring up the issue of time investment
- Bridging her passion in coaching and her job
- Ask clarifying question at the beginning to help client reframe the situation
- Use her skills that work
- What she needs to motivate herself?
- Who else could inspire or motivate you?
- Validation from our work that we could ask someone from our work to acknowledge our contribution.

What questions that we could use for people are blaming?
- How can you move forward?
- How to reframe the perspective by asking what would happen if you are 100% responsible or irresponsible for the situation?
- Ask things that they can control for change?
- Do you have the choice about it (health, relationship…etc.)?
- What are the other ways to do about it?


What are some key words, when you try to define these two words to yourself?
- Blame: Other’s responsibility. Responsibility: my accountability

When you are in blame mode, you are not in action?
What are the signs that when you are being responsible are when you are blaming?
Responsible: I take the ownership. I have freedom to find the way out.
Blame:
- Let the control by the others’ hand. “You didn’t” example (when we say): Didn’t you get my e-mail? Didn’t someone tell you? Didn’t you hear that?
- No one told me. I didn’t know that.
We need to ask ourselves first, could I make sure that it may by my responsibility. (E.g. Do you understand? Am I clear?)

Exercise: think of a time, you are in blame mode? What is the situation about? What did you do? What made it so? What were the expectations that you had that were not filled? What judgment or believe you had to yourself or others?
- When we feel hurt and have no clue what’s going on, we would be easy get into blame mode.
- Passengers expect that airlines should bring the luggage on time. When they don’t not get the luggage, they blame the airline.
- Two people blame on another and o not take the responsibility to solve the issue.