PT103 - Responsibility vs. Blame (1)

Facilitator: Isabelle King
2009/8/24 & 8/31

Provide many different perspectives of situation to bring up the awareness of role at current job.

What are the things were asked or done that helped client to take responsibility?
- How long is the program and how far she still have to go to bring up the issue of time investment
- Bridging her passion in coaching and her job
- Ask clarifying question at the beginning to help client reframe the situation
- Use her skills that work
- What she needs to motivate herself?
- Who else could inspire or motivate you?
- Validation from our work that we could ask someone from our work to acknowledge our contribution.

What questions that we could use for people are blaming?
- How can you move forward?
- How to reframe the perspective by asking what would happen if you are 100% responsible or irresponsible for the situation?
- Ask things that they can control for change?
- Do you have the choice about it (health, relationship…etc.)?
- What are the other ways to do about it?

What are some key words, when you try to define these two words to yourself?
- Blame: Other’s responsibility. Responsibility: my accountability

When you are in blame mode, you are not in action?
What are the signs that when you are being responsible are when you are blaming?
Responsible: I take the ownership. I have freedom to find the way out.
Blame:
- Let the control by the others’ hand. “You didn’t” example (when we say): Didn’t you get my e-mail? Didn’t someone tell you? Didn’t you hear that?
- No one told me. I didn’t know that.
We need to ask ourselves first, could I make sure that it may by my responsibility. (E.g. Do you understand? Am I clear?)

Exercise: think of a time, you are in blame mode? What is the situation about? What did you do? What made it so? What were the expectations that you had that were not filled? What judgment or believe you had to yourself or others?
- When we feel hurt and have no clue what’s going on, we would be easy get into blame mode.
- Passengers expect that airlines should bring the luggage on time. When they don’t not get the luggage, they blame the airline.
- Two people blame on another and o not take the responsibility to solve the issue.