Good Listening Skills (C3 - Get to the point)

How many of you do not have to say a word in one day? Please raise your hand. Just like the answer you showed me, none. Most of us have to say something or speak everyday, with colleagues or with family members. When we talk, we want to be listened. However, when we were audience instead, we often forget this important factor, listening. We interrupt, we talk back, we don't know how to keep patience and just be a good listener. Today, my speech will cover three indices of good listening skills, facial expression, body language and verbal response.

First, facial expression. When we listen to others, our facial expression is the most obvious index showing whether we are interested or not. A good listener always looks at the speaker. Look at the triangle area between two eyes and the nose. Move back and forth from the eyes to the triangle, but not too fast (demo). Please do not look into the eyes directly and deeply (demo). He/she might think you have other intention to him or her. Properly smile is another important message from your face (demo). Keep smiling makes the speaker feel you are friendly and interested in the conversation. At last, nodding your head (demo) from time to time encourages the speaker to share more information with you.

Second, body language. First of all, pay attention to the comfortable distance. Keep about one person's space between the speaker and you (demo). It suits standing or sitting. Observe the speaker's movement and amend the comfortable distance accordingly. Besides, do not cross your arms like this (demo). It shows offensive and critical message intangibly. Consider putting your hands folded or taking notes (demo), by which shows you pay attention to the conversation. When you take notes, you take notes. Do not scrawl on your notes, the speaker can tell. Reminder, don't forget look at the person who talks. You are not talking your notebook, right?

Third, verbal response. One communication contains two persons' active participation. A good listener does not mean that you are muted. It would be really nice that provide some verbal response. You can repeat or rephrase what you heard, such as "As you just mention..." Besides, you can ask questions relative to the information the speaker sated and obtain further information from the speaker, like "Can you give me some examples?" You can also summary a little bit for a period of time, for example "I see, so the facial expression include..." Via these actions, they are sure that you are really here listening with your body and soul.

OK. Let's recap what we just learnt. What are the three indices of a good listener? (Wait for the response from audience.) They are facial Expression, body language and verbal response. Of the facial expression, we look at the person, we keep smiling and we nod our head. Of the body language, keep the comfortable distance, do not cross you arms, keep your hand folded or take notes when necessary. Of the verbal response, we repeat and rephrase as well as ask relative questions. Dear friends, please keep it in mind, when we talk, we wanted to be listened and vice versa.